Leave Fireworks To The Professionals

This is why the average citizen shouldn't play with fire.
You don't want an extreme makeover like this one.

Yes, it's a trick photo--flash plus long exposure. Try it sometime.

Cat On A Cold Shingle Roof.

The '...Hot Tin Roof' title flows better, right?

Taken on Christmas Day 2007 shooting all the way across the street from the paper-ripping with my truly weak 5X-Optical-Zoom Zeiss lens.
But I used the "Spot Meter" exposure setting, which I have never seen anyone else use.
Ever.
"It's cool, y'all!" (That's a verified quote from Gurney/Ambulance/Committed Britney).

If your camera has this (many do) you enable it then put the cross on your subject and the camera will set exposure for that precise point only, ignoring the rest of the frame.
In this case the white cat wasn't blown-out to a nuclear glow and the rest of the frame has a nice darker tonality.
Conversely, if you were taking a photo of a person in shadow or with their back to the sun the result would be a good exposure on your subject and a blown-out background.
Not for casual use, and don't forget to switch it off again or the rest of your pictures will be ruined.

What I Do For You

This is on the fence around the location where I spent an hour shooting pictures for my various websites.
The whole area is contaminated with asbestos from a vermiculite packaging company.
I've visited this place a couple dozen times over three years until it was finally fenced-off, which is when I found out I'm killing myself in pursuit of blog material--the definition of crazy/stupid.

Within 100 feet
In the middle of it
Breathing it in for three different visits
Downwind
See the silhouetted building?
Oh, was I ever deep inside
Guess where?
Yes, this one too

And then there are the times I didn't get anything worth showing, and the band shoot I did here, the times I just went for the art in the silos, several visits looking for trains but not finding them, or when I found some and spent a few hours hanging around...

The BootChucker: A Christmas Tale

Inside the Mervyn's Of The Damned

We found what we needed to buy, almost.
They just didn't have a complete set.
Drove halfway across town to another Mervyn's and found the complete deal.

So all we have to do is pay and go, right?


Right?


Yeah, not so easy.
Seemed like every cashier on both floors went for a smoke (beer?) break at the same time--one register was carrying the load of the whole store as we went around and around and up and down hunting for someone to take our money.

How do you stay in business if every single member of your staff is allowed to vanish for ten minutes simultaneously?
The place could have been robbed silly--screw the cameras, they still have to ID and catch you.

Anyway, the first Merv to appear was in Shoes, so we scooted over and were 2nd in line behind The BootChucker, shown here.
(Click to enlarge)

This lady wasn't happy about all the waiting, and we were her new best friends by virtue of proximity. You know how that goes.

Orders were given, complaints were made, apologies were un-accepted...
And then the young punk behind the register made the mistake of asking her to move over to the next register 3 feet away...

That's when the bootchucker started chuckin' boots.
"Huffhuffcomplain...canyoubelievethisshit...
Ijustwanttobuysomedamnbootsformyniece..." all of this directed towards both the coward behind the register AND us as she throws the boots onto the counter, loses control of the box and pitches it at the cashier "Idon'tneednofuckingbox" and by now she's scuffed the crap out of the boots but wants to save face...

That's when the crazy old bitch turned and winked at me.
Not enough soap in the house to fix that.

Merry Christmas, Y'all!